"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." ~Maya Angelou
I carry you with me into the world,
into the smell of rain
& the words that dance between people
& for me, it will always be this way,
walking in the light,
remembering being alive together
I held her close for only a short time, but after she was gone, I'd see her smile on the face of a perfect stranger & I knew she would be there with me all the rest of my days.
It is still so new & all we see is the empty space, but that is not how it is in the landscape of the heart. There, there is no empty space & she still laughs & grapples with ideas & plans & nods wisely with each of us in turn. We are proud to have known her. We are proud to have called her friend.
Even after all this time the sun never says to the earth, "you owe me". Look what happens with a love like that. It lights the whole sky.
-Hafiz
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Monday, September 21, 2009
Life as of Lately
Let's see...
School is going well. Only taking four classes, the way I like it. I'm taking:
Social Welfare Policies and Services
Human Behavior in the Social Environment
Philosophies and Religions of India
Race Relations
My policy and philsophy classes are the most challenging. The Philosophy class is my first 400 level course and it's so much reading that I think I'll need glasses by the end of the semester.
I moved onto Market street at the beginning of August. I like being in town because if I'm bored I can walk out of my front door and there is always something to do. Yesterday was the restaurant festival where they shut down Gay street and the restaurants all set up stands and hand out free food. I missed it, though, because it was the Eagles first game, but they only disappointed me.
I've been searching everywhere for a job! The bad economy is affecting me in this aspect because it is really impossible to get hired right now. I know a few other people trying to find jobs who have not had luck for months like me. I've applied at restaurants, salons, rec centers, banks, you name it. I did find a job opportunity on Craigslist but it is in Malvern and thats about twenty-thirty minutes from here so I don't think it'd be worth minimum wage. Sigh..
Although times have been hard recently because of my lack of money/food, I've had a lot of help from friends. My mom has been struggling herself but manages to give me twenty dollars every now and then if I don't have any food left and she got me a meal plan (although its the lowest one) but it does help out to have a free meal every other day or so. Yesterday Kyle gave me a huge box full of canned foods, vegetables, pasta, etc. that will probably last me two to three weeks. I'm learning how to manage my money when it comes to food and only buying things that can be used for multiple meals. So...I can't complain, really.
More to come later, maybe.
School is going well. Only taking four classes, the way I like it. I'm taking:
Social Welfare Policies and Services
Human Behavior in the Social Environment
Philosophies and Religions of India
Race Relations
My policy and philsophy classes are the most challenging. The Philosophy class is my first 400 level course and it's so much reading that I think I'll need glasses by the end of the semester.
I moved onto Market street at the beginning of August. I like being in town because if I'm bored I can walk out of my front door and there is always something to do. Yesterday was the restaurant festival where they shut down Gay street and the restaurants all set up stands and hand out free food. I missed it, though, because it was the Eagles first game, but they only disappointed me.
I've been searching everywhere for a job! The bad economy is affecting me in this aspect because it is really impossible to get hired right now. I know a few other people trying to find jobs who have not had luck for months like me. I've applied at restaurants, salons, rec centers, banks, you name it. I did find a job opportunity on Craigslist but it is in Malvern and thats about twenty-thirty minutes from here so I don't think it'd be worth minimum wage. Sigh..
Although times have been hard recently because of my lack of money/food, I've had a lot of help from friends. My mom has been struggling herself but manages to give me twenty dollars every now and then if I don't have any food left and she got me a meal plan (although its the lowest one) but it does help out to have a free meal every other day or so. Yesterday Kyle gave me a huge box full of canned foods, vegetables, pasta, etc. that will probably last me two to three weeks. I'm learning how to manage my money when it comes to food and only buying things that can be used for multiple meals. So...I can't complain, really.
More to come later, maybe.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Its been awhile.
When I first met him, I knew in a moment I would have to spend the next few days re-arranging my mind so there'd be room for him to stay.
Its hard to update anymore because when your heart is broken, there is nothing else to write about.
Its hard to update anymore because when your heart is broken, there is nothing else to write about.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Thoughts
Thursday and Friday were horrible horrible days for me. How did everything seem to be under control then all of a sudden snowball into this? Friday morning around 3:30am, my friend from work's house caught on fire. She lost her eighteen month old baby boy in the fire. My heart is broken for her. Last week she was telling me how adorable he was at the bowling alley and how he would push the ball down the lane and then chase after it. I can't stop thinking about her and how she must be feeling. His funeral is on Tuesday and I'm going to go with Lex. This will be the third funeral for a child under the age of seven that I've been to in the past five years.
Everyone, please make sure you put smoke alarms in your house, and if you already have them- test the batteries. And please keep my friend in your thoughts. I can't imagine what she is dealing with right this second.
Everyone, please make sure you put smoke alarms in your house, and if you already have them- test the batteries. And please keep my friend in your thoughts. I can't imagine what she is dealing with right this second.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
kfc
KFC mashed potatoes and gravy have saved my day. It was really horrible, actually. Probably the worst day I've had this school year, definitely in 2009. BUT comfort food and roommates know how to make me happy. And once again, I'm so lucky to have friends in times like this.
This post is pretty pointless. Sorry.I always X them out but I think I'll just post this one.
This post is pretty pointless. Sorry.I always X them out but I think I'll just post this one.
Monday, March 9, 2009
OBX, coincidences and John Lennon
Spring break is officially over. I went to the Outer banks with my roommates Erin and Kristina and our two friends Kyle and Rodney. We had a good time.
I've been noticing a lot of coincidences/deja vu type events. For example, while driving back from North Carolina on Saturday, I kept realizing that I was always the last one. There were never cars behind me but always cars in front of me. Whenever I stopped at a light, I would be fourth or fifth in line but ALWAYS last. I focused on being the last car a little obsessively, as I kept checking my mirrors at every light or stop to see if anyone was going to come up behind me. I didn't say anything to Rodney or Kristina, though. Then yesterday, I was riding in the passenger's seat of my friend Kyle's truck and he pointed out that he is always the last car to be waiting at lights...that he always thinks about how weird it is that cars are always in front of him and never behind him. I was so shocked to hear him say that that I basically screamed ME TOO!
One of the days I was in OBX, I was relaxing and "getting profound". I found myself thinking about what are the biggest effects our environment has on people which lead me to think about exposure. I thought about censorship and what types of things I was/was not exposed to as a child. I remembered watching the Columbine shooting live at Miss. Jean's (my babysitter) house. I thought about how seeing that at nine years old may or may not have been right. Then, about an hour later, we turned on the tv to find a special on E about the most brutal public shoot-outs in our country's past. Columbine was ranked second while Virginia Tech came in first. It was really uncanny, though, because I rarely ever think about Columbine anymore.
This isn't coincidental or anything, but driving back from OBX I saw a man walking on an overpass. I was looking at him from far away because he was walking pretty slow looking up at the sky. He stopped in the middle and looked down right as I was about to drive under him and he looked exactly like John Lennon! He had the round glasses, the long hair, facial hair..but too bad he died in 1980 and even if he hadn't, he wouldn't look like he did in his thirties! But, some part of me likes to think that maybe it was him.
Even though most of you don't know why, please send me some luck today!
I've been noticing a lot of coincidences/deja vu type events. For example, while driving back from North Carolina on Saturday, I kept realizing that I was always the last one. There were never cars behind me but always cars in front of me. Whenever I stopped at a light, I would be fourth or fifth in line but ALWAYS last. I focused on being the last car a little obsessively, as I kept checking my mirrors at every light or stop to see if anyone was going to come up behind me. I didn't say anything to Rodney or Kristina, though. Then yesterday, I was riding in the passenger's seat of my friend Kyle's truck and he pointed out that he is always the last car to be waiting at lights...that he always thinks about how weird it is that cars are always in front of him and never behind him. I was so shocked to hear him say that that I basically screamed ME TOO!
One of the days I was in OBX, I was relaxing and "getting profound". I found myself thinking about what are the biggest effects our environment has on people which lead me to think about exposure. I thought about censorship and what types of things I was/was not exposed to as a child. I remembered watching the Columbine shooting live at Miss. Jean's (my babysitter) house. I thought about how seeing that at nine years old may or may not have been right. Then, about an hour later, we turned on the tv to find a special on E about the most brutal public shoot-outs in our country's past. Columbine was ranked second while Virginia Tech came in first. It was really uncanny, though, because I rarely ever think about Columbine anymore.
This isn't coincidental or anything, but driving back from OBX I saw a man walking on an overpass. I was looking at him from far away because he was walking pretty slow looking up at the sky. He stopped in the middle and looked down right as I was about to drive under him and he looked exactly like John Lennon! He had the round glasses, the long hair, facial hair..but too bad he died in 1980 and even if he hadn't, he wouldn't look like he did in his thirties! But, some part of me likes to think that maybe it was him.
Even though most of you don't know why, please send me some luck today!
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